A Mother of Multiples

I never really thought that I would be a mother of multiples. I have a small amount of family history with twins. My maternal grandmother was one, but her and her twin were children 11-12. Since the incidence of twining goes up as a woman ages, I wasn't holding my breath that I would have any.

When I realized that we would have to do IVF to have more children, having multiples became a real possiblilty. Even knowing that, it was quite a shock when we were told that we were pregnant with triplets. At first I didn't believe it, but I quickly moved to excitement and a little fear (Jason mostly just stayed shocked.). Although I only knew I was pregnant with triplets for 13 weeks (and everything was normal for only 7 weeks), that was more than enough time to figure out how much that my life was about to change. As I have stated here before, I am a planner, and life with triplets takes a lot of planning. How would we feed all three? How would we move them around? We knew that we had a pair of identicals. I had started thinking about how and if I would be able to tell them apart. I picked out cribs and car seats after I reached the 12 week mark. After we found out that we were having three boys, I thought about how it would be to have a houseful of boys.

When I lost the boys, I lost three children first and foremost. They were three individual children. But, I also lost the experience of triplets. It was not something that I had seeked out, but it had already become part of my identity, part of how I see myself. I am still a mother of triplets, but most people will never know.

When we attempted to get pregnant again, I had mixed feeling about having another set of multiples. Part of me wanted a normal, healthy, full-term singleton. Another part of me wanted another set of multiples. I felt that my body had failed me when carrying the boys and I wanted another chance to prove to myself that I could handle it (I will say more about this in another post). This part of me also wanted to physically belong to a culture that I already felt emotionally tied to.

Although the twins have made me a mother of another set of multiples, I have found is a means to constantly remind me of the boys as well. Often when we come to decisions about the girls, I often ask myself how I would have handled it with three instead. When we are out with the girls, we often draw a lot of questions. Some have looked at our stroll end asked if we have two or three babies. Then we get asked if they are identical or not. It is sometimes answering these questions knowing that they will probably never know that I have three other children and that I have identicals and fratenals. It sound silly I know. Most of them are strangers. Why would I care? I just find it strange that people I meet don't see this big piece of me.

I try to remind myself that I have been greatly blessed. I am blessed to have carryed three little boys, and I am blessed to be raising three children. It is far more than some people get, and far more than I deserve.

6 Months

So as always I am very late in posting these. I got a new toy for Christmas (an IPad) so I intend to be posting a lot more. I have a lot of things to that I want to say, and I have had some posts rattling around in my head for months. But for now, I need to get the 6 month update up before it is time to do the 7 month ones. Eowyn is our wiggle worm. She is never were we leave her these days. She can still pretty much only roll from back to stomach, but she manages to twist and scoot her way around. I am sure she must have teeth moving up although I can not see them yet. She is constantly drooling now, everything goes in her mouth to bite and chew on, and she often rubs things against her gums. The only thing she won't put in her mouth is cereal. We started that about 2 weeks ago. She wants nothing to do with it. I took the girls to their 6 month appointment on Monday. Both girls had double ear infections. I didn't't see that one coming. Neither one had any real symptoms (although they had been really congested for a long time), and Gabriel never had one when he was little. Other than that, both girls are well. Eowyn is weighing I in at 15lbs 3oz.

Tessa is much more laid back than her sister. She continues to be a little physically behind Eowyn's development, but she is catching up. She can also only roll over from back to stomach, but she doesn't usually scoot much. Tessa is still ahead vocally though. She currently loves hearing herself screech. She weighs 16lbs 8oz now.

It is so much fun to watch the girls interact. The talk to each other more these days. The also seem concerned if the other one is upset. If I place them near each other, I will often find them holding hands, or I will find Eowyn's grabbing Tessa's face. I attempt to get a picture of them together every month. This is the best one I got. I have decided it is a good practice to end a photo session once someone starts sucking on someone else's hand.