Last year, completing my taxes was hard. I knew from the time that they were born that I was going to be able to claim Roanin and Kade on my taxes, but I wouldn't be able to claim Nathaniel. In some ways it was hard for me to include them. It felt like I was using them just to get a tax credit. It was also hard to only put two of their names. It was yet another reminder that I never got to see Nathaniel alive. I was also happy to put their names down. In so many ways, I feel like they don't count to other people, but here on my taxes they did. As I entered the boys into the software program I was using, I struggled with the question that has to be answered about all dependents you claim. How long did they live in your house? I stared at the question not knowing what to put. Finally, I opened the help box next to the question. It was a box that I pray you never have to open yourself. It had answers about what to do if you were divorced (sadly common place today), but if you look further there were answers to scenarios like what to do if your child has been kidnapped or has died during the year. I managed to finish the rest of the taxes without further problems. That week at school, I mentioned to my students that I had done my taxes that weekend. One of my talkative students wanted to know if I had claimed a bunch of extra dependents this year so I could get more money back. My heart stopped. Now I don't believe that he knew about the triplets. I had not brought it up to my current students although my students from the previous year obviously knew. I think his comment was random, but I couldn't believe that he had said it to me that year. How does that happen?
As this year approached, I knew I would have to delete the boys off of my dependent list. The software program I use pulls your information from last year and fills in most of the information for you. I know I could have used a different program, but my practical side told me this was ridiculous. When I got to the personal information section, I looked for a way to delete Kade and Roanin from the list. I couldn't find one at first. I eventually figured out that I had to go through their information first before I could chose an option that said that they had died the previous year. It was nice in a way. I was able to click that yes they were my sons before I had to forever remove them from the list. The Lord is gracious though, and I had new names to put on the list as well. I am trying to always keep before me the thought that I am blessed. My dependent list shows that I have been mightily so even if no one sees the other names on my list but me.
